The Olympics have become the most popular and the most prestigious competition in history. Everyone watchest them. Every athlete dreams of being in them. But, have you ever wondered if there is more to the Olympics? Something they don't show on TV? These are the "5 Things You Don't Know About the Olympics".
1. The Olympics Are Basically a Continuous Orgy
During the Olympics, all the athletes stay together in a small town called the Olympics village. It could be more aptly named Boneroplis or Sexsylvania, because of what happens there.
Imagine being in a place full of toned, athletic demi-gods, all at their physical peak. All ten thousand of them, without spouses, parents, or without any kind of strict, daily routine that they had until then. These Olympians are just sitting around in a cool exotic place, with tons of free time. In other words, at the 1988 Seoul Olympics Games, they had to ban outdoor sex. In 1992, the organizers were so overwhelmed, they started giving out free condoms, just to keep the AIDS at bay. And by 2010, at the Vancouver Winter Olympics 100,000 condoms were distributed. They weren't enough. So, if you think Las Vegas is an extreme, you have no idea of what goes on during the Olympics.
2. The Country Hosting the Olympics Becomes a Military State
Obviously, since the countries have enormous expenditures, they need big brand sponsors. So, naturally, they only let brands that sponsor them sell products at the Games. However, let's say you're a small business owner, trying to make money off this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, you're going to be disappointed. Don't even think of using keywords like "gold", "silver", or "London" in your signs or products.
If you accidentally use a combination of these, it's a fine of $30,000. In London, a lingerie store was forced to remove a poster that had five hula hoops and a few bras, because it kind of looked like the Olympics logo.
Also, tons of rights are taken away from you. The IOC makes new rules for the country. For example, they squash all laws regarding Freedom of Speech. No anti-Olympic posters are allowed anywhere. All billboards are rented by the Government. The Police has the right to literally barge into your house and rip down an anti-Olympic poster.
3. Hosting the Olympic Games Will Bankrupt Your Country
Cities all over the world fight for a chance to bring the greatest competition of the world to their country. Hosting the Olympics means your city will get honor and respect for decades. There is no greater honor. But the price is the economy.
Greece learned that the hard way. Its intial budget for the Games was about four and a half billion euros, but double that was quickly used. The final cost was more that 5% of its GDP and, eight years later, they still haven't recovered from the debt. Vancouver has given up trying to recover the money they lost on their Olympics condos. The fancy condos have now become a ghost town. The 1998 Winter Olympics in Nagano plunged the city into recession when taxes went above $30,000 per family in the city. This is why the people of Bern, Switzerland declined the chance to host the 2010 Games. Also, Detroit has stopped bidding for this "honor".
4. Whichever Country Pays the Most Gets To Host the Games
Do you know why Paris didn't get to host the 2012 Olympics? There was a strike the day the IOC came to inspect the city and transport was brought to a standstill. Boom! Too bad, France.
Lots of money goes into wooing the IOC members to choose your town.
IOC investigators discovered that tens of thousands of dollars were spent for each IOC member on gifts and souvenirs. Nagano spent $24 million on their bid. And, in the end, Salt Lake City spent over a million dollars on gifts, scholarships, and ski trips, pampering the IOC Committee.
5. Poor People Get Shoved Out of the Way To Make Room
Cities raise the money for the Games by convincing the citizens that it's all going to be worth it. They're all going to have world-class sports venues, tons of revenue, new jobs in the preparation... Everything's going to be great! But, unfortunately, all these stadiums and venues have to go somewhere. That is where poor people live. Over 30,000 residents of Atlanta were displaced during the Olympics of 1996, seven hundred and twenty thousand in Seoul in 1998, and 1.5 million Chinese were forced out of their homes in 2008.
1. The Olympics Are Basically a Continuous Orgy
During the Olympics, all the athletes stay together in a small town called the Olympics village. It could be more aptly named Boneroplis or Sexsylvania, because of what happens there.
Imagine being in a place full of toned, athletic demi-gods, all at their physical peak. All ten thousand of them, without spouses, parents, or without any kind of strict, daily routine that they had until then. These Olympians are just sitting around in a cool exotic place, with tons of free time. In other words, at the 1988 Seoul Olympics Games, they had to ban outdoor sex. In 1992, the organizers were so overwhelmed, they started giving out free condoms, just to keep the AIDS at bay. And by 2010, at the Vancouver Winter Olympics 100,000 condoms were distributed. They weren't enough. So, if you think Las Vegas is an extreme, you have no idea of what goes on during the Olympics.
2. The Country Hosting the Olympics Becomes a Military State
Obviously, since the countries have enormous expenditures, they need big brand sponsors. So, naturally, they only let brands that sponsor them sell products at the Games. However, let's say you're a small business owner, trying to make money off this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, you're going to be disappointed. Don't even think of using keywords like "gold", "silver", or "London" in your signs or products.
If you accidentally use a combination of these, it's a fine of $30,000. In London, a lingerie store was forced to remove a poster that had five hula hoops and a few bras, because it kind of looked like the Olympics logo.
Also, tons of rights are taken away from you. The IOC makes new rules for the country. For example, they squash all laws regarding Freedom of Speech. No anti-Olympic posters are allowed anywhere. All billboards are rented by the Government. The Police has the right to literally barge into your house and rip down an anti-Olympic poster.
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| Someone just badmouthed Wenlock! Let's go! |
Cities all over the world fight for a chance to bring the greatest competition of the world to their country. Hosting the Olympics means your city will get honor and respect for decades. There is no greater honor. But the price is the economy.
Greece learned that the hard way. Its intial budget for the Games was about four and a half billion euros, but double that was quickly used. The final cost was more that 5% of its GDP and, eight years later, they still haven't recovered from the debt. Vancouver has given up trying to recover the money they lost on their Olympics condos. The fancy condos have now become a ghost town. The 1998 Winter Olympics in Nagano plunged the city into recession when taxes went above $30,000 per family in the city. This is why the people of Bern, Switzerland declined the chance to host the 2010 Games. Also, Detroit has stopped bidding for this "honor".
4. Whichever Country Pays the Most Gets To Host the Games
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| Hm, the houses are quite small here. |
Lots of money goes into wooing the IOC members to choose your town.
IOC investigators discovered that tens of thousands of dollars were spent for each IOC member on gifts and souvenirs. Nagano spent $24 million on their bid. And, in the end, Salt Lake City spent over a million dollars on gifts, scholarships, and ski trips, pampering the IOC Committee.
5. Poor People Get Shoved Out of the Way To Make Room
Cities raise the money for the Games by convincing the citizens that it's all going to be worth it. They're all going to have world-class sports venues, tons of revenue, new jobs in the preparation... Everything's going to be great! But, unfortunately, all these stadiums and venues have to go somewhere. That is where poor people live. Over 30,000 residents of Atlanta were displaced during the Olympics of 1996, seven hundred and twenty thousand in Seoul in 1998, and 1.5 million Chinese were forced out of their homes in 2008.
(You may now applaud)
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